Mar30

It’s our first week at the pair of swashbuckling Snow Whites coming this year, which will raise the obvious question: who’s the better evil Queen, Julia Roberts or Charlize Theron? It’s also our chance to see the Australian Perseus battle the titans once again, this time with more Liam Neeson and an ominously slow speaking Ralph Fiennes. If that’s not your cup of tea, Bully examines the possible bullying epidemic that might just owe its notoriety to its cause: the Internet — or not.

Mirror Mirror: Based on the Grimm fairy tale, Mirror Mirror is the first reincarnation of the classic Snow White tale to hit the theaters this year. The other is the Kristen Stewart vehicle, Snow White and the Huntsman, a film that reimagines the classic tale of maidenhood conflicting with evil queenliness as a warrior battle of good versus evil. Regardless, this one stars Julia Roberts as the at-times-British-accent-laden evil Queen and Lily Collins as the fairest of them all with the whitest skin and blackest hair. I’m not against the reinterpretation of fairy tales – in fact, I think it’s a fine idea; at the same time, I’m curious as to how much the reinterpretation will be disrupted by the need to include puns on Snow White’s name, short jokes about the new, fur-donning dwarves, and the novelty of having an aggressive, sword wielding Snow White bent on “crashing a wedding,” a phrase that was clearly used “once upon a time.”

Wrath of the Titans: Release the crap! is the only thing I can imagine going through the screenwriters’ and producers’ minds as this idea was greenlit. Perseus’ tale deserves to be told, and if it must be added to, then so be it, but the first remake of Clash of the Titans wasn’t worth a second look, so how could the sequel be any better. This one seems to promise more heartfelt cheesiness disguised as profound rhetoric, most notably when Liam Neeson asserts, “being human will make you stronger than a god.” When this was written, I’m sure someone said, “that line is genius,” but what do fifteen-year olds know, really? Overall, this flick looks to be filled with decent The Mummy Returns-like CGI circa 2001 and a two hour ride of Sam Worthington kicking ass and dodging Cyclopi. Venture at your own risk, or save your money for the inevitable Rise of the Titans. Remember, good things come in threes – just like deaths.

Bully: First, let’s point out the irony that this film, one that examines the debate over cyberbullying, pitting those who want to curb it against those who feel it’s “just boys being boys,” has been rated R, which means that the content within is not appropriate for any audiences under 17 – or to be more specific, those in high school – and to be even more specific: those who are most likely to be subject to bullying. Appropriately released in the wake of the guilty verdicts levied against Dharun Ravi, Bully looks at the growth in bullying – or perhaps examines that recognition that has come onto bullying. And herein lies the intriguing argument at the heart of this documentary and the issue in general: do the internet and our ever-sprawling social networks increase the severity of bullying, or does it just make the always-present bullying more apparent?