This Will Probably Only Last One Night Anyway

Filmmakers are immune to the adage that those who don’t learn from history are destined to repeat it. Therefore, this is happening: Universal hasn’t given up The Wolfman and intends to reboot the series and create a film, tentatively titled “Werewolf,” that has more in common with George Waggner’s original 1941 film The Wolf Man than the character’s most recent iteration.

There were a number of holes in last year’s version and a number of wasted moments that were masked with cheesy metaphors like saviors arriving on white horses. However, the proposal to release a newer new version of The Wolfman seems rather unnecessary, primarily because there is not enough material to release a “series.” Werewolves are not superheroes. They cannot control their rage and aggression. This is why they are hunted. If a werewolf were a benevolent creature who stopped grandmothers from being mugged and rescued chickens from rogue thieves, then a few flimsy storylines – or at least one regurgitated with new characters – might be fabricated. However, Werewolves suffer from bloodlust and are the very thieves raiding chicken coops and cattle ranches, so creating a more faithful rendition to the original would still lead to the same place.

Maybe they could squeeze a sequel out of it, and instead of having the movie end with a death-driven “blaaagh,” the protagonist will wake up in a barn in the presence of someone who has discovered his alternative identity, and this someone must be compassionately understanding and want to help our afflicted canine protagonist … during the next full moon … a month from then.