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Today’s Sign of the Apocalypse — Lohan Singing Hava Nagila

Regardless of whether you missed Liz & Dick, or you were the three who watched it, you’ve probably heard that Lindsay Lohan is not doing nearly as well as she was during her Herbie and Mean Girls days. She owes Charlie Sheen money; she has a huge tax bill; her storage locker is probably going up for auction soon; and, there a number of pesky allegations against her, including assault.

I’m not one to completely revel in Schadenfreude, but can we finally acknowledge this recent development as a cry for help? According to the New York Post, they received a letter from 123Talent pushing Lohan as a hirable guest at birthdays and Bat Mitzvahs:

Page Six received an email pitch from 123Talent with the subject line “Book One of Hollywood’s Biggest Movie Stars Lindsay Lohan Now!” offering us the opportunity to request the presence of Lohan herself at whatever event or venue. [NY Post]

The Post is the last line of publications that anyone should consider reliable – unless they were pitted against monkeys working on Hamlet. However, they’re often accurate when it comes to celebrity gossip, so I don’t doubt that they received this email.

At the same time, 123Talent, which appears to be a real agency doesn’t list Lohan under any one of their drop down menus. I’ve never heard of most of the people under the client list and its subsets, with the exception of a few athletes, Paris Hilton, and Morris Chestnut, so it seems that they would be completely willing to put someone of Lohan’s notoriety on their site, if only to draw traffic.

If the Post is correct and 123Talent is truly pushing Lohan, then we’ve all found our go to when we’re not sure if the sloppy, half-dressed friend-of-a-friend can make an appearance at our respective galas.

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Dustin Freeley is a co-founder of Movies About Gladiators and a member of the Online Film Critics Society OFCS. He has been a lecturer in the English departments of Hunter College and the College of New Rochelle, where he taught writing, public speaking, critical analysis and literature. His essay on Breaking Bad and the economy of time is being published next May.

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